Have you had that baby yet?

The past 2-3 days, I've been inundated with phone calls, texts, and Facebook messages asking if I've had the baby yet. My estimated due date was yesterday, August 16th.

So, have I had the baby yet?

I stopped answering the calls and texts. Nothing personal, but I think anyone could understand that I'm a bit busy right now, and I just don't have the energy to be fielding the same questions over and over again. So, here are the answers to Womb Watch 2014's FAQ:

Q: How are you feeling?
A: Pretty good. Tired. Ready to have a baby. Excited.

Q: Why haven't you been induced?
A: Because I don't need to be. My pregnancy has been pretty much textbook-perfect (knock on wood). There is no medical reason to induce me at this point, and there is unlikely to be a medical reason until I get closer to 42 weeks.

Q: When will you be induced?
A: Unless an emergent medical need arises, not til 42 weeks. Yes, it's safe. Yes, my midwives are monitoring me. And yes, I'm perfectly fine with Ender baking for as long as s/he needs to. 40 weeks is a very rough estimate, and not a really accurate one at that.

Q: Have you tried [insert "natural" ways to induce here]?
A: Soapy water. (Meaning, of course I have. Except castor oil. That stuff freaks me out.)

Q: Is the baby's name really Ender?
A: No. English major, not punishment-loving parent. Ender is a nickname, since we don't know baby's sex. No, it doesn't necessarily mean this is our last child, either. Ender was the third child in the book, and we were amused.


So, to sum up: unless there is a newer post to the contrary, see the above link whenever you feel the need to ask me if I've had the baby yet. Considering how excited we'll be, it's unlikely much time will pass before we're announcing Ender's arrival from the rooftops. Please be considerate as we're busy and exhausted, and likely will be even after the baby is born, which means I'm even less likely to get back to people than usual (which is awful, I know). I won't be pregnant forever, and you'll know once I'm not.

And yes, this post is full of snark and attitude, because I really am that tired of answering the same questions a billion times over.