Resolutions

I think I was so busy with a new baby last year that I didn't actually set any resolutions. Or if I did, I either didn't write them down or I just can't find them. Big mistake on my part. :)

I've really been thinking about what my goals for this year should be. There are a lot of really good and great things I could pursue. There's so much I have on my plate, and so much more that I want to do!

I've been thinking a lot lately about my family, specifically my relationships with  my family. And to be honest, I find them lacking. Because in a lot of cases, I don't have much of a relationship with them. The blame is laid squarely at my feet, because to be honest, I don't put a lot of effort in. And it really is difficult to admit that.

It's not because I don't love my family. I do, very much. One of my most treasured memories is of our family together in the Chicago temple when I was sealed to them (and later when Chandra was sealed to us). I want to be with them for eternity, and I look forward to that.

In the case of my older sisters, it's kind of explainable. I was so young when they left home, and believe me, I was incredibly obnoxious as a child. (And that's an understatement.) So to be honest, I really don't know them. I've put forth some effort, but not as much as I should.

Granted, I'm busy. I'm a wife and a mom to 2 young kids, in addition to going to school and church activities and social activities and everything else that seems to accumulate in the lives of a young family. But that doesn't really excuse me.

I want to be close to my family. I want to have friendly, comfortable relationships with them. And I know that has to start with me.

So I have one resolution this year, because I want my entire focus to be on this.

This year, I will focus every possible energy on developing my relationships with my family. I will initiate contact because I genuinely want to. I will ask questions because I genuinely want to know the answers. Because I want to get to know them. Because how can I have a genuine relationship with someone I don't really know?

I know I won't be perfect. I'll probably still forget to send a birthday card to a couple of people. I'll try not to forget. My dedication will probably wane towards the end of semesters when I'm frantically finishing schoolwork. But the least I can do is try.

So, Johnsons (and Minsters--you guys are getting included, too!)--be prepared. I may ask you some really stupid questions. By the end of the year, it's quite possible that you'll be completely sick of me. But I promise that I'll know you better than I do now! And who knows, you may even decide you like it! ;)